Sunday afternoon.

[24 June]

Brandon from army said that in primary school, he mixed better with girls than with guys, and that he had no guy friends in primary school.

I see a part of him in me. I do mix better with girls than with guys. Except the few. Maybe it's because girls are easier to talk to. And because of their nature. They have this happy aura-ish glow kind of feeling about them. And then after a while, I get all comfy and do/talk something weird.

I worry less when I talk with girls for the first time. Most of the time it's easier to talk to them than with guys. Conversations flow smoother. If I were to talk with guys, sometimes I feel the urge/need to portray this strong-willed guy. Quite simple because I'm not large in stature, and to some, I might seem weak and frail. Hence the urge to portrait an image.

Revisiting this topic again, it does some good for me. I get to analyse myself once again. I mean, everybody needs to do that once in a while. Have you been living the way you want your life to turn out? Have you been doing the necessary to make sure it does? Are there influences in your life that bring you further away from who you want to be?

I must admit, there have been quite a number of times when I needed to stop myself and take a few steps back. Tough, but necessary.

I wonder about a lot of things. I wish I could solve things by thinking about them, and then they would be rectified just as the thought went by. That would be pretty cool.

But whatever.
I miss convention.
I want to rewind to that Sunday afternoon.
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Take me back to that day. I want to be happy again. I want to be at peace again.