[
Reach,
It's not as bad as it seems.
I cleanse in the river for somebody else,
For anyone but myself.
Your time will come,
If you wait for it,
If you wait for it.
It's hard, believe me,
I've tried.
But i keep coming up short
But believe me when i say,
I wouldn't have it any other way
]
well. yesterday was quite a day.
woke up at 1120hrs. SORRY CLAIRE. 종말미안해!!
she's the only reason i woke up, cuz she called me. in my sleep i could hear my phone vibrating beside me. too bad i couldnt feel it. but it was annoying. woke up the moment it stopped, glanced at the clock beside my bed, BOOM. chiong out. first thing i did was to reply her. but that was at 1144hrs (yes, im looking at the conversation string now), and that was when i was at the mrt station. MARSILING MRT STATION. tell me how fail can i get -.-
i think she was rather upset. i was too. like...at myself. told ali about it all the way till i reached jcube. apparently she was late for school. like....EXACTLY THE SAME AS ME. super scary. like....when her bus arrived, my train arrived. then when she was reaching, i also was reaching.
weird.
but anyway, when i reached, smsed claire asking where she was.
"i'm at the lepak zone btw"
"top floor? or above the skating rink that floor?"
"got aircon one."
"Okay im walking ovrrrrrr"
then i sent again.
"Am i lost? i cant find the 'lepak zone' in the directory O.O"
"you dk where mehh. you found it. i think."
weird. i went past the skating rink observation platform once, didnt see her there (though i kinda thought that she'd be there) then went up to the top floor. couldnt be there, then that's when i got the "you found it" sms. went back down one floor to the platform, poof, she was there!!
but anyway. i felt really bad. like. SUPER BAD. i planned the movie and the lunch but it didnt happen since i was late. sigh. horrible me. got the tickets first then went to cold storage since we had 40minutes spare. supposed to catch the 1220hrs slot, but then had to catch the 1300hrs one instead. my fault lah.
the movie was kinda okay. i was hoping it would have more punch in it. like....more action. space fights, stuff like that, yaknow? throughout i didnt really say much. figured that claire wasnt gonna say much, for whatever reason. not that i had anything to say also. my fault that we were catching the later show. paiseh like siao eh. but that dumb cinema. NO COUPLE SEATS CAN YOU BELIEVE IT. RIDICULOUS. when i saw the planning the day before (thursday), i was like.......WHATTHEHECK. kesian. but idk. even if it did have, she was keeping to herself. she said she was cold though she had a jacket on. i didnt bring mine cuz i didnt need it. so what to do?
scooted my hand over to her seat palm up, looked at her.
sigh. what was i doing.
she didnt even look.
got me feeling kinda lame.
well, it was mid-way through the movie, so she was probably focusing on the film.
took my empty hand back.
she had to see this fella from a blogshop to collect noel's bag at 3pm. the movie lasted till 1440hrs, so we headed straight over. then her mom called asking her to check out this dress, so claire changed plans and headed to where her mom was. we missed 2 trains, so when hers arrived, she got on, i headed to mine.
throughout, i really didnt have much to say. i guess the both of us werent really into talking.
throughout, i didnt wanna look at the time. if i did, it would only remind me that i was losing my time with her.
it was short.
i realised soon that it has always like that. going out to do something then headed off when it ended.
well, next time we go out, it's gonna be something different. i just gotta plan things differently.
if i do, things should turn out differently.
right?
on the way back at marsiling mrt, i donated $10 to these fellas doing a charity drive. i checked to make sure that they had the certificate of authentication nonsense-thingy to make sure that they're allowed to do these stuff. felt better after that. but not quite enough.
there's so much for me to improve.
but i'll get it.
i will.
someday.
all i need is time.
i've got the effort.
i just need the time.
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