Tio lo

[16 July]

It's a Thursday morning and I'm awake at 5am. I take the guys for morning exercise at 5.45am and begin eating breakfast at 5.55am. The IC asks for a 10-minute breakfast.

Since I'm an understudy, I take on understudy roles. As of yesterday evening, I was appointed as the laundry ic. We work on a rotation basis, and share the key among the other laundry ICs every week.

My first task was to open the room for a trainee who booked in at night. I changed into my admin attire, opened up the room, and started to organise the whole place. It was so messy. Soon I picked up the trainee and passed him the stuff that he required (which I had already picked out for him) (see I so nice).

Ended up taking 7 more blankets for my guys who don't have (since we were all poorly equipped). Carried them up with farizal and he helped me distribute them.

Sometimes I wonder about what kind of a sergeant I should be. Then, after a long time, I'll catch myself and remind myself that I already have a role model: Sergeant Hambali, from my BMT phase. Cool, funny, casual, tolerant, understanding, hopeful. Yeah, that's who I wanna be. A sergeant that others can look up to and emulate. I mustn't go back to my drum major days. But if I need to, I will.

But it'll take time.

[12 July]

Sushi dinner with Claire (I should come up with a nick for you) last week on Tuesday, got affected by the train breakdown, so reached home at about 10pm wearing my army uniform. STEADY BO??!! The ride back home was memorable. Definitely one of my prouder moments as a Singaporean, as an NSF, while wearing my uniform. Definitely.

Not much happened last week aside from that. Probably gonna forgo getting the pullover since I don't see myself wearing it often in the near and distant future. Just as I thought. Definitely an impulse buy Hahaha. Kinda glad we didn't find a nice one XD

Friday dinner moved to Saturday, but ended up getting cancelled. Yeah. Gonna reschedule for another time but not now. Probably in a week or so then talk about rescheduling. Quite overdue already sia this dinner.

Now I instructor for spec course, so my nights end earlier, and got more time to do my own things.

New chapter

[12 July]

Tomorrow will mark the first day of me being an instructor in the medical Institute in the army. Looking at it now, it does seem like a daunting task, but I hope that I'll be able to overcome it just as how I do with other challenges that come my way. We just had last parade with the trainees, and so ridhwan and I both introduced ourselves. It felt weird saying "I am 3rd sergeant samuel" because I'm so used to saying "sct samuel lim". I'm not accustomed yet to calling the other instructors (who were my own instructors in the beginning) by their first name. Well, I'll get over it someday.

There's rahman here who was in the same diploma course as me, and there's a guy from raven (my bmt company) here too. I don't think I'll have to draw the line with them since it's pretty straightforward. I'm sure they already know to separate their work life from personal life.

These men that I train will be the face of the medical corp as they are posted out. They will be the ones to save lives and lead the way. They will be the pillar of support to those whom they serve.

So here's to a new life, many new lessons to learn and re-learn, responsibilities, duties, privileges, fun and laughter, disappointment and annoyance. I look forward to finishing strong.

Maccau

Book out on Friday, went back home use com until 7.30pm, follow mom reluctantly to old checkpoint to buy some storage containers, oovoo with my sec4 classmates till 1.30am while playing L4D2 with Ezra.

A late night disagreement was what ended the day. Went off to bed a bit annoyed, woke up to my multiple alarms in the morning. It rained, but I continued to have my breakfast. Somewhere somehow the disagreement from the night before rose up again. More annoyance. I quickly headed off to adventure cove with the YSAs. Right at douby I got a call which lasted for 45mins 3secs.

Real shit.

Was otp from douby all the way till midway of the boardwalk. SMS taopok all the way till the other late fellas arrived. Stood alone, sat alone, walked alone. I didn't wanna be around anybody. Everything was so stupid and unreasonable. I couldn't bear it. When we first reached vivo, some wanted to buy some stuff. I just stand outside with my phone. I don't know of how to be gentle. I don't know how to be kind. I don't how to be human.

I just stood there as I would have stood anywhere. And I just kept talking on the phone, not caring for anything in the world, not caring about how anyone would view me, how anyone would judge me. Totally didn't care. After some time, ming came out and picked me up when they were done shopping, so we headed off. I remained at the back, all the way from vivo to boardwalk to RWS. I only got off the phone when I was like 10mins away from acw.

So yeah.
Really bad start to a day that should be filled with happiness. Ended up having to leave early to help clean the church building. Sigh. Really annoyed.

Why like that one huh -.-

Buat bodoh

[2 July]

"All I wanna be, all I ever wanna be, is somebody to you."
Whoever you are, let me know who you are. Some things can wait, but matters of the heart are a different matter.

Anyway. Book out on Tuesday, chiong to band, went all the way up to the gate, but the security guard didn't let me in. I asked them if the band left already, they say left already. I said that my source told me that they ended only at 6pm. But they insisted that they had already left. I asked if the teachers left already, they say all the teachers left already. If all the teachers leave already, then who lock up the school? Who ensures that all the keys are returned? Who makes sure that all the students left the premises already?

Please lah, you lazy to check my name whether inside the alumni file only then just say. I chiong from camp wearing my no4 all the way to school to see my juniors, and then you give me this.

Even better. The bus at yishun at 6.30pm still can see my band members carrying their concert uniform taking the bus. Champion. Still can say all of them left already. Steady lah.

Anyway. Trying to get there by either Tuesday or Thursday latest. At least hear them play everything once through. They're gonna be performing at Gardens by the Bay, so I'll really wanna be there. Back in my days, we never had the opportunity to have external exposures like these. They've really grown so much. I wish I could, but oh well. What can I do, right?

Anyway helping SP karate club get some medics for the upcoming competition... I would go if it were a Saturday... But too bad it's on a Sunday. I could have earned some extra money. And can put to use my medic skills also...meh. Hopefully everything goes well.